I was watching a documentary about a circus which had been in one family for three generations. The circus had the usual entertainments of trapeze, clowns, jugglers, lions and tigers. Part of the tiger show has to do with the trainer going up to the tiger who then kisses him. After the show the interviewer commented that it looked as if the tiger loved the trainer. The trainer replied, “Well, he does love me, and I love him, but even if they love you, they’ll hurt you.”
How like the tiger we sometimes are! There is a song which says, “You always hurt the one you love.” Sometimes we don’t fully see or understand how we have hurt or neglected the one we love until they’ve died. When we pick up the phone to call them then we realize where they are AT&T is of no help! You become painfully aware of things that you meant to say and of things that you wish you hadn’t said. The loss of them can cause our emotions to bounce around like a pinball machine gone berserk, leaving us confused.
I remember saying to someone that I was afraid to love them as much as I did because then I would miss them when they were gone. And it has now come true. My friend’s response was, “You can’t truly be alive without loving, even knowing that one day you will lose the one you love. When that loss occurs, you take that relationship and invest it in another person.” Such advice can be difficult to remember when in the midst of profound loss. What has helped me has been to remind myself that I loved as best I could at that time. Today I will love better. I will remember and reinvest what I learned about love into someone else. Lord knows, there are plenty of people around needing some love!