It’s funny how when we hear a song from the past our feelings and memories can suddenly be yanked backward for a few minutes and we are living there once again! Sometimes we even romanticize the past to such an extent that we yearn to live there rather than in today! I suspect that living in yesterday was actually no easier than we find living in today! At the same time it’s true we have certain pressures in our lives today that were not present in the past! One example is technological advances in communications have given tragedies and conflicts on the other side of the world the same immediacy for us as the crabby family next door! There seems to be a level of stress in life today which causes some to be fascinated with lives other than their own! Reality shows, lives of television and movie stars, gossip and rumor magazines abound!
Letting off some steam from a pressurized life can be a healthy thing! But what we indulge in by way of releasing that pressure can have unintended effects that go beyond the immediate moment! Drugs and their addictive quality as well as excessive alcohol come to mind! No less dangerous can be overindulgence with gaming! I once spent months counseling a young couple for whom gaming was at the center of their impasse with one another! They both worked full time but when the husband came home he began gaming and would stay at it for 12 hours or more, sometimes even until he had to walk out the door the next day to return to work! It came as no surprise to find out that sex no longer played a healing role in their relationship!
Loving one another should enable us to embrace sacrifices on their behalf! On the other hand a love enabling the other to be and remain irresponsible and immature is no love at all! Love wants the happiness of maturity for their beloved even if that means one must take a tough stance before Life makes choices for them! We do no kindness to allow our beloved to get away with being irresponsible! We simply cannot grow up for someone else if they’re not interested in doing it for themselves! When one member in the relationship does not and will not grow up then the other most likely will choose a path that still allows themself to grow. This new path inevitably leads away from the beloved. I wonder if our fondness for things retro-healthy or unhealthy desires are to escape the pressures, people and demands of the present? The proof I suppose is in the growth that results or lack thereof. The young gaming couple got divorced!