On the show “Cops” I have observed that quite often when the police stop someone and begin to question them, the individual being questioned begins his explanation or excuse with “Officer, straight up, I’m not gonna lie to you” and then continues with an explanation for why he did whatever he did. The thing is that quite often by the time that you get to the end of the episode you discover that, indeed, the person WAS lying because in the end they admit it! Whenever I see an episode like this my first reaction is that a normal person, for whom lying is not a way of life, does not begin a conversation with a disclaimer the purpose of which is to try and convince the listener that they are not doing what it is clear that they are doing!
Why do we think that we can play games with Truth? Why do we think that we actually get away with something when we are duplicitous? What kind of a person approaches situations and relationships with the mindset of trying to see how much they can get away with? Certainly not one who has his head on straight! In order to “get away” with something we have to be furtive, and when we are furtive we actually make a prisoner of ourselves, becoming someone who must always be on their guard lest they be found out. Being honest is actually about being able to be free, beginning with freedom from hiding!
At the end of each episode what stands out for me is how profoundly unhappy the individual is, partly because he got caught but mostly because he is lost within a duplicitous approach to life out of which it is clear that he cannot find his way. What he, and we all, yearn for is the freedom of happiness, but this can only be found when we are willing to stop running and willing to be fully present. We may not star in an episode of “Cops”, but a fruitful question for all of us to ask ourselves, straight up, is: In what ways are we dishonest with ourselves and others?